Obituary and My thoughts.

Terry Kim Tomkinson (Rusch)  1958-2014

Terry was born to Robert and Shirley Rusch, six weeks late, on Dec. 21, 1958. She was born in Bridgeport, Nebraska, the third of five children. The family later relocated to  Sunnyvale, California where Terry attended school, graduating from Homestead High. 

She married Dan C. Tomkinson on August 18, 1979 in the Oakland, California temple for time and all eternity. Together, they had 6 beautiful children and 12 grandchildren. The family resided in Payson until they built their dream home in Orem, Utah in 1991.

She was a very talented artist and a wonderful seamstress, and had the ability to create beauty in everything she touched. Her creativity and talent were gifts that she shared freely, and used touch the lives of many.

Terry was well known for her acts of service, and always had an open bedroom for those who needed a place to stay.  Though her family was large, her heart always had room to welcome everyone into her life and family.Through the years, many people have been blessed through her generosity and kindness.

Terry was a dedicated mother, and worked various jobs throughout her life to help provide for the needs of her children. She spent 24 years working for Repartee Gallery in American Fork, using her talents to create many beautiful works.

She lived a life of service and willingness to serve the Lord, a legacy that she has passed on to her children.  She was a faithful member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints and served faithfully in various callings.  Her testimony of our Savior never wavered, even in time of sorrow and trial.

Terry adored her twelve grandchildren, and spent her days spoiling them in any way she could. From beautiful handmade quilts and dresses, to treats before dinner, she let them each know that they were loved. She never let a birthday, anniversary pass without a little something to let you know she was thinking of you. Her family was her greatest joy, and her presence will be deeply missed.

She is survived by her husband, Dan, her children, Karla (Seth), Rana (Allen), Troy (Liza), Cora (Josh), Sister Ashley Tomkinson, and Ashlynn (Sloan), and her 12 grandchildren.

She is preceded in death by grandparents, a nephew, and many friends and loved ones. 

 A viewing will be held Sundburg-Olpin mortuary in Orem on Monday, March 17th from 6-8:00pm. Funeral services will be held on Tuesday, March 18th at the Provo Stake Center (835 S 500 W) at 10:00 am, with a viewing one hour prior to services. Per Terry's request, please do not wear black. Private graveside services will be held for the family members in Orem.

To help the family offset funeral and hospital costs, donations are being accepted at Mountain America Credit Union under the Terry K. Tomkinson memorial account. 

Now to follow my husbands wonderful letter and experience. How can I even compare?  His words and his thoughts were almost the same as mine. But I want to put it here so then I can reflect on my own thoughts and memories. 

Lets see....  Ok I will start with the day before.  The day before March 13th we had a meeting with the Dr's. Just so we all knew what was going on.  Some ill things were said but we as a family who have seen her for almost three weeks knew it was time.  That she wasn't going to be herself and if she did live here on this earth that her body would be a prison and not a body she would want to be in.
Her mind was clear and aware but her body was broken as was mentioned.  After the meeting we asked the ICU nurse if it was okay if we brought the kids today to let them say their final goodbyes. Personally this was one of the hardest things to do.  

At first we waited as Casey and Rana were in the room still.  We waited so we could let mom rest for a few moments.  Liza got to take some beautiful pictures of everyone's family but ours.  But that was because we had Jennifer. (Seth's sister) She was there to help comfort the children when our arms were full with others.  I of course had to stand near the children to tell them the signs.  

Then the kids were ready after 5 min of seeing her.  We were confused.  So Seth told them "this will be the last time you will see your grandmother alive."  Then the tears and the true realization was raw and there.  They started to cry and wanted to just hug and hug and love on her. Dannan and Truman were so small that they couldn't hug her.  They could only hug her arms.  I told Seth to lift them up so they could hug her.  So Truman and Dannan got to hug her "superman" style.  It was really a sweet moment.  Logan kept saying "Why does she have to go?  Why can't she just stay here with us?"  I told him that "Grandma's body isn't going to be her body.  She wouldn't be able to enjoy the things she used to do.  That her body would be in a wheelchair and she wouldn't be able to eat, play, breath on her own ever again."  I think he really still wishes she was still here.  I mean don't we all?  But I pray he will find peace and comfort in all of this and know that Grandma is in a better place and better body.  

The next day was such a beautiful day.  I mean warm sunshine, beautiful non smog air, birds and everything was alive.  And here I was going into the hospital to see one end.  I can't believe how calm everyone was.  We sat outside in the waiting room while others said their final personal goodbyes.  The second floor of the hospital has to be one of the most depressing floors of the Provo hospital.  I still don't know how the nurses were so sweet, kind, loving and just so amazing to everyone.  I feel so blessed to have nurses that mom had.  And the Dr's so SO! very  sweet.  OK sorry had a squirrel type moment.  Back on the train. 

As Seth and I said our goodbyes I told mom that Ashley had chose to stay on her mission, and that you loved her and that she was going to make you proud and teach those who were in Canada.  She agreed with me and closed her eyes.  She was very Lethargic that day.  

When it was time to pull the tubes out I wasn't sure I wanted to be in there.  Because I was worried that she was going to choke and just pass away like that.  But I'm glad I stayed.  She was so happy to have that tube out.  She moved her mouth in such a way that made it look like she was so thrilled to not have that really annoying tube there anymore.  She also showed signs that half of her face had drooped and that her tongue would have stuck out.  

Time seemed to go by so slowly and fast all at the same time.  There came a time that the nurse suggested that we go take care of ourselves.  Go to the bathroom, eat, rest if needed.  Most of us took a big break.  (Well like a half hour one)  Then as we were walking back to the room Rana came out and said that her stats were really low and to contact others to get there asap.  But when we walked into the room her stats were back up pretty high.  But we called and the whole family seemed to be up back in there fast. 

As we sat there again I closed my eyes a lot.  I had a really bad headache coming and I wanted to try to just hold mom's hand and rest.  As I did songs started to flood my head.  But one that had been going through my mind this whole time was "How Gentle God's Commands"  Hymn #125.  I don't know why that song stuck in my head this whole time but I know for sure that it brought such a peace to my troubled heart.  I knew that if I listened and did what the Lord wanted I would do it. 

I watched the monitor like a fly on the wall.  Her heart beat faster and faster as the heart was compensating for oxygen and is very normal.  But a rare thing kept happening.  It would go super high then low again for several min.  Then finally it went from 135 to 80 to 40 to 24 then 0.  When I saw that I bawled.  I knew it was coming but to see mom gone was hard. I saw her take her last breath.  Grandma then said "She's just a child"  And to them she was.  

The feeling in the room was amazing.  It was like heaven.  Take the temple feelings and times it by like a millions.  Such peace and if you could describe soft as a feeling it was there.  I felt that mom was giving all of us a big hug.  

I feel at peace, I feel sad but peaceful.  I have shed my tears and I am sure more will come.  My love for mom also increased and I am so thankful for the days I got to spend with her.  The times I got to just sit in peace and hold mom's hand as she would open her eyes to watch the Waltons on the Hallmark channel every so often.  I loved that I got to quietly pray for her soul and body to be at peace.  The times she opened her eyes to see me.  One day after she woke I was there reading to her the ensign.   She watched every move.  I loved that I got to see Seth love, comfort and blessings.  I could not be more blessed to have such a wonderful loving husband.  

I hope all of you hug your mom's a little tighter, love more deeper and see the things in the world that we miss.