Temple

This past week has been incredible for our little family.  It has been one of the most interesting and most inspiring things to have happen in a long time.  I wanted to share a bit of the letter that Seth had written to Cody  (my cousin who is currently serving a mission in Independence MO)

So here are the parts that express my thoughts exactly.  More like a journal entry.

 Now for the last temple experience: when we finished the endowment most everyone made it into the Celestial room before Ashlynn and Sloan did.  That’s fairly typical when both male and female go through the temple together and it’s awfully convenient because then the family can be there when they come into the room.  In any case being “just a brother-on-law” I decided that I’d keep back for a while and let everyone else go and say their congratulations.  I really have never talked to Ashlynn or Sloan for more than a few moments.  Very much like your and my relationship.  We’d hang out at family functions and occasionally now and again by chance but we’ve never had any deep meaningful discussions about life etc etc.  Anyway, when most everyone had their chance to congratulate Ashlynn I took my turn.  As I was giving her a hug I told her how proud I was of her and how they were going to make a great couple.  Then I had a instantaneous moment of clarity (or an IMC).  I’m sure this happens to everyone now and again but I’ll explain it anyway.  Every once in a while it seems like my brain will speed up and think a million thoughts in a matter of a second.  I’ll come to long chains of conclusions and opinions based on many many thoughts going through my head but it all happens in an instant.  In any case the following occurred to me: First, I remembered the little pouty girl at my wedding.  She was six at the time and was upset all day because she hadn’t been allowed into the temple.  Second, I remembered a year or so later when Terry asked me and Karla to tutor the twins on their reading because they were falling behind.  I felt at that point a great sense of big brotherness to them and a sense of concern for their well being.  Third I thought of a conversation my co-workers and I had about how amazing it is that any human grows up to be a normal well adjusted adult.  With all of the teasing and bullying that goes on in our youth it’s truly amazing that any of us don’t end up complete mental wrecks.  Fourth I tied that thought to the younger version of Ashlynn and had all of that concern for her seven year old self.  Lastly I came back to the present and realized that she was “all growed up” and that she was going through the temple marrying a great guy and starting a new chapter in her very successful life.  I got all choked up and we backed up from each other which only made it worse for Ashlynn who had already cried on several occasions (for which I felt really bad the last thing she needs is to have some no-account-brother-in-law making her cry).  She hugged me again.  Karla standing near us asked what I had said and gave us both a hug at the same time.  I didn’t explain it to her then but I’m sure she’ll read it here before she sends this letter.  Hi honey.  Perhaps I was just being overpowered by the wonderful spirit that was there and the various experiences that I had during the session.  Either way I truly am super happy for her and have never felt as much of a brother to her as I did then.  Lesson learned: go to the temple on a regular basis so that I can have these experiences one at a time.  It’s quite exhausting holding in that many tears in such a short timeframe. 

The next day the crazy busyness only continued.  We had made plans for bunches of family and friends to come over for Ethan’s ordination.  That was compacted since my Elder’s Quorum President is out of town and since I’m the First Counselor he asked me to attend the PEC meeting Sunday morning.  I was at the church at 7:45.  Then the meeting went long and I hurried back home to help finish getting the kids ready for church.  Church was pretty typical except that Rana and Allen attended with us.  I was conducting in Elder’s Quorum and the person assigned the lesson didn’t show up so I gave and impromptu thought about my First experience in the temple and asked others to share any other temple experiences that they had.  It went well. 

After church was over I had to run around like crazy hoping to get everything setup for Ethan’s ordination.  There was no way we were all going to fit into the Bishop’s office and the Bishop and I had planned to use the classrooms upstairs.  However, it occurred to me (because Karla had arranged for everyone to be there by 12:30) that the other ward might use those classrooms.  I went into the chapel right after their Sacrament meeting had finished and talked with one of the Bishopric.  He said that they do use that room and suggested that we use one of the Chapel overflow sections.  Which worked out really well.  I’m not sure why I had worried so much about it.  I did continue to worry about people not showing up until 12:30.  I had expected that the Bishop would have other settings apart to do but they didn’t.  So we had two members of the Bishopric and two of the Young Men’s presidency waiting around for the family to show up.  Everyone was there by 12:32 so it wasn’t that big of a deal and I simply need to quit worrying.

Onto the ordination.  I had previously asked the Bishop (because I simply couldn’t remember) if I would perform the ordination or he would.  He said that I could do that and we had to check his book about how to say the proper parts of the blessing.  Once we had all gathered the Bishop gave a little informal welcome to everyone that was there. Our Bishop has been called for only a few months now.  He’s a great guy and often his emotions come to the surface without him being able to help it.  He choked up a bit and then we went to give the blessing.  All the Melchizedek priesthood holders in attendance stood in the circle (Me, My dad, b-i-l Steve, b-i-l Allen, b-i-l Josh, Scoutmaster/Friend Cory, YM Pres. Brian, 2^nd Coun. Bishopric Ross, Dan, Reid, and the Bishop).  Seems like I’m forgetting one or two people.  Only four of my siblings showed up (all four sisters in fact) and only one of the husbands came.  Everyone from the Tomkinson side was there except Sloan (he had a lesson he was teaching) and Troy’s family.  And you of course but I’m sure you were there in spirit.  I had joked with Kip that if only he had the priesthood he could stand in the circle with us.  Another little bit of backstory: When I know I’m going to be giving a blessing I typically think about the reason for the blessing and what sort of gospel principles go along with it.  I also think about some topics that I might cover if I was giving advice to that person.  That way when I’m giving the blessing and the spirit directs me I can say things eloquently rather than fumbling over my words.  Backstory done: I hadn’t prepared like that for this blessing.  It’s not that I specifically did not prepare that was I just simply forgot.  I began the blessing with Ethan’s full name and then suddenly the weight of the situation overcame me.  Ethan is twelve years old, in no time he’ll be on his mission, I have thus far been an adequate father and he’s made the right choices to get himself here, he’s surrounded by those that love him and support him.  I couldn’t help but crying which I did freely.  Actual tears streaming down my face and I couldn’t even wipe them away.  I didn’t even try to stop.  I did stay silent for a few seconds.  The bishop standing to my right gave me a little squeeze on my shoulder and I began with the blessing.  As a side topic the only two parts that are different from a normal father’s blessing is that you “confer the aaronic preisthod” and “ordain to the office of a deacon.”  With all of the proper parts of the ordination completed I started speaking by the spirit.  It was completely different than any blessing I’ve ever given before.  Thoughts came into my head and words flowed.  I’m sure I stumbled over several sentences but only because I was crying.  It was a great blessing from our Heavenly Father in which he blessed Ethan with several promises about blessings he would receive through faithful service, how he would be an instrument in the Lord’s hand to do the Lord’s work, courage to do what is right, the love of our Heavenly Father to go with him, the spirit to testify to him of the truthfulness of the gospel and the service that he will perform.  I knew when I was finished.  I don’t know how I knew it I simply knew that all things that needed to be said had been said.  I closed the blessing and hugs and handshakes ensued.  It was a truly amazing experience. 

After the ordination everything else fell right into place.  Many congratulations and hugs were given to Ethan.  We stacked the chairs in the overflow and went to the house.  There was just the right amount of food, salads, and desserts.  Everyone had a great time.  Family chatted and ate and made merry.  Kip, Allen, and Josh spent a bunch of time playing the Perplexus’ that we have.  You’ll remember that Casey brought a Perplexus puzzle with him when they visited prior to your leaving for your mission.  We’ve purchased that one as well as the next bigger one.  The cousins played downstairs with various arts and crafts and on the Xbox.  Folks dispersed slowly until it was just us and my sister’s family.  I was drained.  I love having big family gatherings and even funnier I love it when it’s at my house.  I don’t know why.  It seems like I would like it less because of the stress.  Karla really took care of all of the planning.  Sheesh .. all I had to do was mow the lawn.  

I wanted to add in that I also thought of her when she was an infant and was crying in my arms.  I was like a second mother to her for about a year.  My mom suffered from a blood clot when she had the twins and we were up nights and sometimes during the days.  It was a great thing for me.  Because it had prepared me to have children of my own.  She is someone so special.  I have no idea of what I am going to do when  Ashley is going through. I think I will have to cry in a corner till I can compose myself.  In a way I was closer to Ashley.  I always give myself a bit of guilt for getting married and moving out when I did.  Because I wanted to be closer to them.  But in a way it worked out.  I got to tutor them along side with Seth.  I got to watch them grow, and have the oprotuinty to be the older sister I have always wanted to be. 

With Ethan it is the same thing.  Watching him grow from an infant to a 12 year old is amazing.  And it is a amazing that I am bringing up a Son of God in such a horrid world.  BTW making cookies and food for more than 30 people is not my idea of fun. But I wanted to let him know that it is important and that we all look up to him for his choices and that there are those who do look up to him even though they do not live in our household.  

Now for some pictures.  Some are of the engagements  bridals and Ethan.  I still need to get a good warm day to do their pictures.  (My kids)  I kind of missed last years. 

Anyways enjoy and thanks for reading as far as you did.  As a reward you get.... uhhh... respect. :D